— Relationships —

MY FAVORITE FALL SWEATER

pin it

My favorite fall sweater had several loose threads when I packed it away last spring, but I wasn’t ready to consider throwing it away. A few days ago, it wasn’t even out of the storage box when I started twirling and tucking the loose threads, thinking I could magically reattach them.

Discarding things has never been easy for me. It’s not that I’m a hoarder. I’m a fixer. A serial fixer. There… I said it out loud. Moving on from people hasn’t been easy either.

Some of my earliest memories are of needing to fix my father’s hurt feelings, helping a small bird that fell from a back yard tree or comforting my infant brother because my mother didn’t.

Now that I’m mature wiser, I understand it’s impossible to fix someone who doesn’t want to be fixed. There are times when the best decision is to let them go. We have to accept that perhaps they were in our lives for only a season, or long enough to teach us something. Once that lesson–whether it’s good or bad–has been learned, we need to allow them to move on. Perhaps that’s why the changing of the seasons has been difficult for me, too.

Knowing we have to let go is one thing, staying positive through the changes is another.

Fall has always been the most difficult transition for me. The sun sets earlier and my favorite people, my grandchildren, go back to school. Their activities make it harder for us to spend time together. I’m so busy with work that it sometimes seems I’ll never catch up, and as I add layers of fall clothing, it seems I’m also adding layers of anxiety.

By the time fall is in full swing, the magnificent colors of the foliage make it impossible for me to stay sad. Even the sky is a deeper blue. I can’t get enough pumpkin and chocolate flavored everything. The warm sunshine-filled afternoons and crisp cool evenings remind me to slow down and take it all in because this, too, shall pass. Soon the leaves will fall, but for now, I don’t want to dwell on what’s next.

Each season we need to find something to look forward to and something to love about the people with whom we share them. I know, all too well, they may not be with me once the branches are bare.

While the seasons will change, and people will come and go from my life, I will not change my need to mend hurt feelings and to fix what’s broken.

My old soft sweater has never failed to comfort and keep me warm. Wearing it reminds me things and people can’t stay forever, but we should love and take care of them while they are with us.

 

 

 

 

 


12 Comments

  • LA CONTESSA October 10, 2017 at 9:26 pm

    BEAUTIFUL SAID!
    OFF TO SEE MOM TOMORROW!!!!!!!

  • Doreen McGettigan October 10, 2017 at 9:49 pm

    Thank you. Have a nice visit with your mom. Have her send you a voice mail you can save.

  • Carol A Cassara October 11, 2017 at 5:47 am

    It’s a different view of fall, Doreen, isn’t it?

    • Doreen McGettigan October 16, 2017 at 3:00 pm

      It really is. I am learning to enjoy the most colorful time of year.

  • Carla October 11, 2017 at 9:01 am

    This is such a beautiful piece. Living in Texas I always feel as though I should love the fall because it’s finally a transition away from the heat but it always makes me sad. With the cooler weather come shorter days and people seeming to hibernate like animals.

  • Beth Havey October 11, 2017 at 1:20 pm

    Lovely, Doreen. Fall is great, even in CA, where the weather gets cooler and I can pull out my favorite Sweaters!!

    • Doreen McGettigan October 16, 2017 at 3:03 pm

      I am learning to enjoy the cooler weather.

  • Rebecca Forstadt Olkowski October 11, 2017 at 1:52 pm

    Lovely post, Doreen. it’s nice that you have the seasons and the sweaters to match. We don’t have much of a change here in LA. I don’t hang on to much but it’s nice to have something that gives you comfort when life gives you challenges.

  • Brenda Coffee October 12, 2017 at 11:43 am

    Beautifully said, Doreen. From a clothing point of view, I prefer fall. Personally, fall makes me a bit sad because those people I’ve treasured most have all died in the fall. While I’ve rebuilt my life, I think I will always be a bit melancholy then. xoxox, Brenda

    • Doreen McGettigan October 16, 2017 at 3:08 pm

      I am learning to have fun with the wardrobe changes. I’m not sure I’ll ever get over being sad during the times of the year I lost my loved ones.

    You Might Also Like

    MAKE LIFE COUNT.

    Sign up to our list and we’ll send you our sought-after guide “45 Ways To Change Your Life”
    I'm happy you've joined us! If you like what you read, I'd love for you to stay and subscribe to our updates by email. We have a great community of like-minded women, and your presence can only make it stronger.